The Light Bulb Joke, Republicanized

1. How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb?
   Three. One to hire a Mexican guy and two to deport him when he's done.
2. How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb?
   Just one, but millions volunteered to get rid of anything dark.
3. How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb?
   Just one, but it'll be a hundred years before electricity makes it to the area.
4. How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb?
   Two. One for the labor and one to borrow a billion dollars for the materials.
5. How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb?
   260. One who already wants to change the light bulb, and 259 politicians to make a law forcing him to do it.
6. How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?
   200. Ten to attach the bulb to the sun, and 190 to make the sun revolve around the Earth.
7. How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb?
   None. Change is evil and we should leave the light bulb as it is.
8. How many naked Republicans does it take to change a light bulb?
   Two, one guy to do the screwing and Richard Curtis to "help him out."
9. How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb?
   Two. One takes a working bulb out of another light and gives it to the other Republican, and then both lights get new bulbs by magic.